This was SUPPOSEDLY published in a flyer or a guide of some sort some tourism company launched. Based on questions they claimed they actually got from people planning to go there.
Probably not true. But what the hell:
Q: Is it always windy in Australia? On TV, I've never ever seen rain. How do you grow plants? [UK]
A: We import fully grown plants, plant them, and watch them DIE.
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Q: Will I spot any kangaroos ot the streets? [USA]
A: Depends how much ypu drink.
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Q: Could you give me some info on hippo races? [USA]
A: AFRICA - kind of a triangle shaped continent south of Europe... AUSTRALIA - a big island (??) in the middle of the ocean... Don't forget it. Ang hippo races take place every Tuesday night at King Cross. Come naked.
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Q: Can you send me a schedule of Vienna Boys Chorus performances? [USA]
A: AUSTRIA is a small country next to Germany... Forget it. Chorus plays every Tuesday night at King Cross. Come naked.
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Q: I visited Australia in 1969. I met a pretty girl there. Can you help me find her? We were at King Cross together. [USA]
A: Sure we can! You'll still have to pay for each hour though.
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Q: Will I be able to communicate in English in whole of Australia? [USA]
A: Sure, but you will have to learn it first.
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Q: Is milk in Sydney's supermarkets available throughout the whole year? [GER]
A: No, we're a nation of peaceful carnivorous hunters. Milk is illegal.
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Q: Are there Chrismas in Australia? [FRA]
A: Only during Christmas.
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Q: Is it true that in Tasmania there are more men then women? [ITA]
A: In gay clubs, yes.
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Q: Are there perfumes in Australia? [FRA]
A: No, we don't stink.
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Q: Can I bring my own cutlery to Australia? [UK]
A: What for? You can eat with your hands, like we do.
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Q: I'd like to take a walk from Perth to Sydney. Can I walk next to train tracks? [SWE]
A: Sure, it's only 3000 miles. Bring lots of water.
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I could think of few things like that for guide to Poland ;)
Probably not true. But what the hell:
Q: Is it always windy in Australia? On TV, I've never ever seen rain. How do you grow plants? [UK]
A: We import fully grown plants, plant them, and watch them DIE.
-----
Q: Will I spot any kangaroos ot the streets? [USA]
A: Depends how much ypu drink.
-----
Q: Could you give me some info on hippo races? [USA]
A: AFRICA - kind of a triangle shaped continent south of Europe... AUSTRALIA - a big island (??) in the middle of the ocean... Don't forget it. Ang hippo races take place every Tuesday night at King Cross. Come naked.
-----
Q: Can you send me a schedule of Vienna Boys Chorus performances? [USA]
A: AUSTRIA is a small country next to Germany... Forget it. Chorus plays every Tuesday night at King Cross. Come naked.
-----
Q: I visited Australia in 1969. I met a pretty girl there. Can you help me find her? We were at King Cross together. [USA]
A: Sure we can! You'll still have to pay for each hour though.
-----
Q: Will I be able to communicate in English in whole of Australia? [USA]
A: Sure, but you will have to learn it first.
-----
Q: Is milk in Sydney's supermarkets available throughout the whole year? [GER]
A: No, we're a nation of peaceful carnivorous hunters. Milk is illegal.
-----
Q: Are there Chrismas in Australia? [FRA]
A: Only during Christmas.
-----
Q: Is it true that in Tasmania there are more men then women? [ITA]
A: In gay clubs, yes.
-----
Q: Are there perfumes in Australia? [FRA]
A: No, we don't stink.
-----
Q: Can I bring my own cutlery to Australia? [UK]
A: What for? You can eat with your hands, like we do.
-----
Q: I'd like to take a walk from Perth to Sydney. Can I walk next to train tracks? [SWE]
A: Sure, it's only 3000 miles. Bring lots of water.
-----
I could think of few things like that for guide to Poland ;)
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