WWI explained as a bar fight

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  • RacingTowardsRed
    Advanced Member
    • Oct 2008
    • 152

    #1

    WWI explained as a bar fight

    So apparently this is a repost. Sorry guys.
    I'm a bit of a WWI aviation nerd, so bare with me

    Germany, Austria and Italy stand together in the middle of the bar, when Serbia bumps into Austria, and spills Austria's pint.

    Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit, because there are splashes on its trouser leg.

    Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view.

    Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

    Germany tells Britain to go fuck themselves.

    Britain is not amused.

    Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for cleaning Austria's trousers.

    Russia and Serbia look at Austria.

    Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at.

    Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.

    Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so.

    Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene.

    Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it?

    Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action.

    Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium.

    Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone.

    Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

    France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.

    Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.

    Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings, because Britain made Australia do it.

    France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

    Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

    America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.

    By now all the chairs are broken, and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.
    Last edited by RacingTowardsRed; 03-09-2011, 12:52 AM.
    sigpic
  • Dermeister3
    E30 Enthusiast
    • Feb 2009
    • 1184

    #2
    R (efer to sig)
    Last edited by Dermeister3; 03-09-2011, 12:50 AM.

    Comment

    • damith
      E30 Addict
      • May 2006
      • 422

      #3
      E
      [All the Bronzit haters]

      Comment

      • thornado327i
        E30 Addict
        • Oct 2006
        • 501

        #4
        E yeah - always wanted to do that. Now my mission is complete :)

        Comment

        • damith
          E30 Addict
          • May 2006
          • 422

          #5
          Originally posted by thornado327i
          E yeah - always wanted to do that. Now my mission is complete :)

          U r still late for the "E" my friend
          [All the Bronzit haters]

          Comment

          • RacingTowardsRed
            Advanced Member
            • Oct 2008
            • 152

            #6
            Got it..
            sigpic

            Comment

            • thornado327i
              E30 Addict
              • Oct 2006
              • 501

              #7
              Originally posted by damith
              U r still late for the "E" my friend
              Why? it's "REEPOST" isn't it? :)

              Comment

              • mamzak
                E30 Modder
                • Mar 2010
                • 883

                #8
                Where the fuck is the big Boss Dawg Canada in this?
                Originally posted by Dozyproductions
                All girls fuck but not all girls fuck around with combustion engines.

                Comment

                • MaxBell
                  E30 Fanatic
                  • Oct 2010
                  • 1391

                  #9
                  Big boss dawg Canada didn't really want to get involved, but they did and helped out alot, and really found themselves through the whole experience.
                  REMEMBER: Be safe and have fun is Rule Number 1.

                  The Epic Unbuild of Clint Eastwood

                  Comment

                  • SamE30e
                    R3V Elite
                    • Sep 2007
                    • 4319

                    #10
                    Originally posted by mamzak
                    Where the fuck is the big Boss Dawg Canada in this?
                    Wait for it...

                    Waittttt for itttt......

                    (I'm waiting for an American to make a stupid Canadian comment involving beavers, geese, bacon or snow...)
                    1985 325e 2.8 Turbo VEMS

                    Comment

                    • frankenbeemer
                      R3VLimited
                      • Sep 2009
                      • 2260

                      #11


                      Check post 17 for WWII summary.
                      sigpic
                      Originally posted by JinormusJ
                      Don't buy an e30

                      They're stupid
                      1989 325is Raged on then sold.
                      1988 325 SETA 2DR Beaten to death, then parted.
                      1988 325 SETA 4DR Parted.
                      1990 325i Cabrio Daily'd, then stored 2 yrs ago.

                      Comment

                      • frankenbeemer
                        R3VLimited
                        • Sep 2009
                        • 2260

                        #12
                        Originally posted by SamE30e
                        Wait for it...

                        Waittttt for itttt......

                        (I'm waiting for an American to make a stupid Canadian comment involving beavers, geese, bacon or snow...)
                        What do urine samples and Canadian beer have in common?
                        The taste.
                        sigpic
                        Originally posted by JinormusJ
                        Don't buy an e30

                        They're stupid
                        1989 325is Raged on then sold.
                        1988 325 SETA 2DR Beaten to death, then parted.
                        1988 325 SETA 4DR Parted.
                        1990 325i Cabrio Daily'd, then stored 2 yrs ago.

                        Comment

                        • SoEm0
                          E30 Addict
                          • Feb 2010
                          • 449

                          #13
                          and the piss water made by budwieser is better?
                          CCW- when every second counts... The police are just minutes away!

                          Comment

                          • ck_taft325is
                            R3V OG
                            • Sep 2007
                            • 6880

                            #14
                            Originally posted by SoEm0
                            and the piss water made by budwieser is better?
                            No. But at least it's not Canadian...
                            Need a part? PM me.

                            Get your Bass on. Luke's r3v Boxes are here: http://www.r3vlimited.com/board/showthread.php?t=198123

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