Bare with me on this. Part of this is looking for advice how to approach the situation, the other part is me just ranting and bitching.
Little back story first. About two years ago my ex and I split. I needed a place in a pinch, one of my best friend knew a guy right in the neighborhood I wanted to move who needed a roommate. The catch, everything is in my name because he has terrible credit. Whatever, mine's good I had no problem with that, I'm also the only one on the lease. Real nice guy but sort of messy, his room looks like that of a 16yr old girl. Clothes piled everywhere, dirty dishes from god knows when. He's also very hermit like thanks to a video game obsession. I go weeks at a time without seeing him, it's weird. However he respects my space, pays his rent on time and occasionally cleans up and genuinely is a nice dude, we just have NOTHING in common. I don't mind really, it's like having a roommate but not, ha.
Anyways, fast forward to a few months ago. He starts seeing this girl he met online. She lives in Cleveland which is about a 2.5 hour drive and she doesn't have a car. For awhile he was up there on the weekends. He asked if I minded if she came here for a few days. I told him not at all, my girl is here quite a bit. She would take the bus down or he'd bring her back occasionally. Usually staying the weekend or a few days here and there. Then it was she was down for a week at a time. Supposedly looking for a job and a place to live. That was about 2 months ago.
Now she has been here for a solid month and half except one weekend they went up to her place. Like I said I rarely even see either of them so I sort of feel like an ass for this bothering me but here's my issues: she doesn't work so she is here all day when we're not. I'm weird about people being in my home when I'm not. Numerous times I've come home and found the front door unlocked and no one else here. I brought that up right away and I think she has a key now...again, not real cool with that either. She doesn't pay rent or help with utilities even though she seemingly lives here now.
Not exaggerating she takes 4-5 showers a day. Usually in the morning when I need to, right when I get home from work, and in the evening. The water bill has gone up about 20% which I pass on to him so whatever but the inconvenience of having one bathroom and it being occupied often for 20min at a time is getting old. Not to mention the sink top is full of girly ass things and I have to clean the shower drain all the time from her hair..yuck.
She uses many dishes and never cleans them. They are just set in the sink and washed as needed or until I get fed up and do them. I've mentioned this before to no avail.
The other morning I came home and some random girl was sleeping on my couch using my pillow (had stayed at the GF's) and his girl was in the shower...again. She left to go somewhere leaving me and random (unattractive) girl in here. Eventually she leaves and left the door partially open and unlocked.
I could go on about little stuff here and there but they're trivial and come with living with other people. So my dilemma is how to approach this with my roommate. He's a nice dude so I don't want to come off all alpha male and tell him his gf has to leave, but I'm kinda tired of feeling like I have a stranger living in my house. I also loathe confrontation, I avoid it at all costs so I'm trying to think out the best way to confront him without sounding like a jerk. I know I rarely see them and it probably shouldn't bother me but it's starting to get to me. I've lived with a couple before and it's awkward. I don't like feeling out of place in my own home.
End Rant
Nick
Little back story first. About two years ago my ex and I split. I needed a place in a pinch, one of my best friend knew a guy right in the neighborhood I wanted to move who needed a roommate. The catch, everything is in my name because he has terrible credit. Whatever, mine's good I had no problem with that, I'm also the only one on the lease. Real nice guy but sort of messy, his room looks like that of a 16yr old girl. Clothes piled everywhere, dirty dishes from god knows when. He's also very hermit like thanks to a video game obsession. I go weeks at a time without seeing him, it's weird. However he respects my space, pays his rent on time and occasionally cleans up and genuinely is a nice dude, we just have NOTHING in common. I don't mind really, it's like having a roommate but not, ha.
Anyways, fast forward to a few months ago. He starts seeing this girl he met online. She lives in Cleveland which is about a 2.5 hour drive and she doesn't have a car. For awhile he was up there on the weekends. He asked if I minded if she came here for a few days. I told him not at all, my girl is here quite a bit. She would take the bus down or he'd bring her back occasionally. Usually staying the weekend or a few days here and there. Then it was she was down for a week at a time. Supposedly looking for a job and a place to live. That was about 2 months ago.
Now she has been here for a solid month and half except one weekend they went up to her place. Like I said I rarely even see either of them so I sort of feel like an ass for this bothering me but here's my issues: she doesn't work so she is here all day when we're not. I'm weird about people being in my home when I'm not. Numerous times I've come home and found the front door unlocked and no one else here. I brought that up right away and I think she has a key now...again, not real cool with that either. She doesn't pay rent or help with utilities even though she seemingly lives here now.
Not exaggerating she takes 4-5 showers a day. Usually in the morning when I need to, right when I get home from work, and in the evening. The water bill has gone up about 20% which I pass on to him so whatever but the inconvenience of having one bathroom and it being occupied often for 20min at a time is getting old. Not to mention the sink top is full of girly ass things and I have to clean the shower drain all the time from her hair..yuck.
She uses many dishes and never cleans them. They are just set in the sink and washed as needed or until I get fed up and do them. I've mentioned this before to no avail.
The other morning I came home and some random girl was sleeping on my couch using my pillow (had stayed at the GF's) and his girl was in the shower...again. She left to go somewhere leaving me and random (unattractive) girl in here. Eventually she leaves and left the door partially open and unlocked.
I could go on about little stuff here and there but they're trivial and come with living with other people. So my dilemma is how to approach this with my roommate. He's a nice dude so I don't want to come off all alpha male and tell him his gf has to leave, but I'm kinda tired of feeling like I have a stranger living in my house. I also loathe confrontation, I avoid it at all costs so I'm trying to think out the best way to confront him without sounding like a jerk. I know I rarely see them and it probably shouldn't bother me but it's starting to get to me. I've lived with a couple before and it's awkward. I don't like feeling out of place in my own home.
End Rant
Nick
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