New Harry Potter book

[h0lmes]

Burbage dies on pg. 12
Hedwig dies on pg. 56
Mad-Eye dies on pg. 78
Scrimgeour dies on pg. 159
Wormtail dies on pg. 471
Dobby dies on pg. 476
Snape dies on pg. 658
Fred Weasley dies on pg. 637
Harry gets fucked up by Voldemort on pg. 704 but comes back to life on pg. 724
Tonks, Lupin, and Colin Creevy have their deaths confirmed on pg. 743

19 years after the events in the book:

Ron has married Hermione, their two children are named Rose and Hugo
Harry has married Ginny, their three children are named Lily, James, and Albus Severus.
Draco Malfoy has a son named Scorpius

The epilogue shows all of the children boarding the train for Hogwarts together.

The final lines of the book are: "The scar had not pained Harry for 18 years. All was well."

"NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU BITCH!"
Molly Weasley, to Bellatrix lestrange,
P. 736

[asubimmer]

great who cares? HP is for chicks

[TheEtaUnderdog]

4chan.org ftl

and its 19 years

[Ender.]

Cool you ruined the book, not that I was going to read it anyway...

[silversleeper]

You killed it for me, but I was gonna read it. But luckily enough, I have a horrible short term memory, so this will all be forgotten by tomorrow.

[imsotyerred]

i was at the barnes and noble last night, wasted, running around in a robe with my hair sprayed neon red screaming "i am Fred Weasley!" with my (hispanic) friend running around garbed similarly yelling "No, i'm fred!"

we even passed a bunch of cops, i thought we were screwed...but then they just say "oh, they must be fred and george..."


if i remember correctly, which i probably don't, i jumped in a fountain and swam around...then walked home dripping wet

[AppState325]

hahahaha. I love it. well done

[blunttech]

god i hope this shit dies soon. everytime i turn on the news i see nerds dressed up like that little potter waffleswaffleswaffleswaffleswaffleswaffles and people having harry potter parties. wtf is wrong with people?
i think its great for kids the way it makes them want to read but these fucking loser teenagers should be out trying to get some ass.

[Jand3rson]

I think there were about 200 people wrapped around Barnes & Noble here last night.

[blunttech]

i would like to go to one of those gatherings as "harry peter" and have a huge inflatable cock that i could pump up and it would spring out from under my costume to terrify young girls

[czag13]

I think there were about 200 people wrapped around Barnes & Noble here last night.

i passed by last night around 11:30 to see if i could jump in line and buy it(yes i do read harry potter) but decided it wasn't worth it because there were over 1,000 people (yes, 3 zeroes) in line. this is probably because there's only one place to buy the book out here and theres absolutely nothing else to do out here either.

[gazellebeigem3]

i would like to go to one of those gatherings as "harry peter" and have a huge inflatable cock that i could pump up and it would spring out from under my costume to terrify young girls

The cops would be called faster than when cope gets within 1000 feet of a grade school.

[AndrewBird]

I was at Target today and they had several on sale for $14.95.

[Jand3rson]

I was at Target today and they had several on sale for $14.95.

BAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Fuckin dorks.

[imsotyerred]

damnit, and i got it at price club for $17