Am I in the wrong here?

[TwoJ's]

I need a little bit of insight about something that happened at Safeway yesterday.

Preface: I listen to children being interviewed by CPS for work every day, so I am very sympathetic to kids that aren't fed properly.

I was in line to buy my groceries and there was a lady in her 30's behind me with three kids. She had a loaf of bread, bologni, peanut butter and some Ramen noodles. Maybe I judged a but, but it appeared that she was financially strained. I turned to her and offered to buy her groceries because someone had done it for me once.

Then she freaked out on me and started yelling a bunch of shit about how I shouldn't assume she's poor and all different kinds of shit. At first I was offended and I just dismissed her as a crazy and went on with my business.

But the more I think about it, I think she may be right. I mean, I was only trying to do her a favor, but maybe I shouldn't have been so quick to pass judgement? Also, if I were extremely pressed for money and someone offered to buy me groceries, I wouldn't turn them down.

[32.5i]

She probably only flipped out because she is in a financial struggle. If she wasnt she would have politely told you she didnt need any help.

I think you did the right thing no matter how she acted. The world needs more people like you!

[Brian D]

"No good deed goes unpunished". It was a nice thing to offer, but somehow it offended her. You'll never know why, but it doesn't mean you should let it bother you too much.

[archemedes]

Many people today are too proud, and get embarrassed when an offer like that is made. I have done it at the gas station when the guy in front of me is putting a dollar in gas in to get his kid home from school, and he got offended, until I told him my son was in her class

[whiltebeitel]

what 32.5I said. Glad to know guys like you are around.

[TwoJ's]

Well it's reassuring to hear that. Don't get me wrong though, I'm not some mother theresa type person. If she wouldn't have had those kids with her, I probably wouldn't have thought twice about it.

[Turf1600]

Crazy that you even bothered. Maybe I'm a tad jaded - but I think down in TX most people would take it whether or not they needed it and probably still yell at you. OR just offer to buy my food with their lone star card.

[Charlie]

Many people today are too proud, and get embarrassed when an offer like that is made. I have done it at the gas station when the guy in front of me is putting a dollar in gas in to get his kid home from school, and he got offended, until I told him my son was in her class

Bingo. Pride is the only thing people have half the time, and they cling to it well past the point where it's advisable.

Screw it, I don't turn down a free meal or a free dollar.

-Charlie

[Maluco]

I can't imagine anyone who wasn't in a dire situation accepting that, mostly if there were other people around. Regardless, it was a thoughtful thing to do.

[Philipangoo]

wow so that must have been quite awkward when you were checking out and she was just standing behind you... hahaha

That was a wonderful offer though. There are lots of people in need, and its a shame that pride gets in the way of them accepting help, especially when kids are on the line.

[TDE30]

In the wrong? Nah. It might not have been the ideal situation, but that doesn't excuse the woman's response to your generosity. I can see, in a very small way, how the woman might have mistaken the gesture as somewhat offensive from the younger guy driving away in his BMW. Nonetheless, her reaction sounded a bit brash.

Had the woman gone to the register with a couple of bills and coins, to the point where some items needed to be put back due to the lack of money, then that would have been a good time for your offer. In that scenario, it wouldn't have been at all offensive and she would have easily understood what you were trying to do.

It was a stand-up gesture, but I guess everyone's situation is different. Man, I really could have used someone like you when I bought gas today. :D

[Farbin Kaiber]

I gave a kind gesture, totally out of my norm, but I gave a guy with a gas can a ride to his car at 5:20 in the morning. Part of me was worried he was gonna stab me with a utility knife and steal my car, the other was pissed off at society allowing me to formulate those negative assumptions.

[Massive Lee]

A few weeks ago, a lady in her mid-20s and her young daughter (about 5 or 6) where at the cash in a cafe, and could only afford half of something. They took it and sat at a table. When it was my turn, I bought what I needed to take out and paid for a couple of pastries and asked the clerk to give them to the lady and the girl after I am gone. This way, there's no way they could be insulted or filling like I am hitting on her, or stalking her, or whatever.

Lee

[jflip2002]

Both Two Js and Massive, those are both generous offers. Two Js, I wouldnt be too bothered by it. Thats just another person who will genuinely appreciate it, that you can now help instead. Good job, I wish I was as polite and unselfish. It just seems like most people here who need the help are meth head bums, who dont get SHIT from me.

[mattdk318i]

Keep it up guys....the world definitely needs more guys like you. Regardless