The difference between US' and France's presidents

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  • Fidhle007
    I can fly, motherfucker
    • Oct 2005
    • 7209

    #16
    Originally posted by CAOSyAMOR
    Well I remember growing up, eating seal blubber dipped in maple syrup, sitting in my parent's igloo, and my father would tell me grand stories of this french ship that sailed through the broken ice to our shore.

    The boat was filled with stinky men who wore red and white striped shirts, and beautiful women with big hairy armpits. 'They ate a lot of baguettes', he told me. 'And smoked a lot of cigarettes through long skiny black sticks'.

    Onde day as my dad was tying up the dogsled to go on a whale hunt, one of the beautiful french women with bigt hairy armpits asked if she could come along. My dad, not able to speak a word of french was more than happy to oblige and said 'Oui Oui!' What my dad was really saying was that his wee wee was getting hard and he wanted her to touch it.

    As they were in the middle of the hunt my dad's sled broke through the ice and he fell in the frigid water, hypothermia soon to set in. The young, beautiful french girl with the big hairy armpits was quick to think. She braided a rope out of her long brassy armpit hair and threw the lifeline to my father.

    Upon returning home we all rejoiced and feasted on Tim Horton's coffee and donuts while the french people put on a mime show, drank wine, ate cheese, and then we all had a massive french orgy like on those television shows you used to stumble upon late at night when your parents were fast asleep. But guess what!? Your parent's were not asleep, no, your dad was balls deep in your mother's vag and ps, that scary noise was not a monster under your bed, oh no, it was your mom gargling your father's hot steamy baby juice before she took that final gulp.

    Stereotypes - if we can't laugh at ourselves, laugh at others ;-)
    I lol'd. The sad part? I actually have a dogsled. Several in fact... :D
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    • mrsleeve
      I waste 90% of my day here and all I got was this stupid title
      • Mar 2005
      • 16385

      #17
      Originally posted by Fidhle007
      Last time I saw a woman with hairy armpits was in Vermont...

      Southern Central New York State. the town of Hancock to be exact.
      Originally posted by Fusion
      If a car is the epitome of freedom, than an electric car is house arrest with your wife titty fucking your next door neighbor.
      The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money. -Alexis de Tocqueville


      The Desire to Save Humanity is Always a False Front for the Urge to Rule it- H. L. Mencken

      Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants.
      William Pitt-

      Comment

      • Collin
        E30 Mastermind
        • Aug 2008
        • 1736

        #18
        Originally posted by mrsleeve
        Southern Central New York State. the town of Hancock to be exact.
        It's the PA leaking across the border. Hipster girls in philly have been sporting them.
        The Keystone Killers

        Originally posted by Cabriolet
        With 73k+ post, you'd think he'd have learned a little about life.

        Comment

        • vlad
          Banned
          • Dec 2003
          • 0

          #19
          funny...

          Comment

          • FredK
            R3V OG
            • Oct 2003
            • 14744

            #20
            Originally posted by CAOSyAMOR
            Well I remember growing up, eating seal blubber dipped in maple syrup, sitting in my parent's igloo, and my father would tell me grand stories of this french ship that sailed through the broken ice to our shore.

            The boat was filled with stinky men who wore red and white striped shirts, and beautiful women with big hairy armpits. 'They ate a lot of baguettes', he told me. 'And smoked a lot of cigarettes through long skiny black sticks'.

            Onde day as my dad was tying up the dogsled to go on a whale hunt, one of the beautiful french women with bigt hairy armpits asked if she could come along. My dad, not able to speak a word of french was more than happy to oblige and said 'Oui Oui!' What my dad was really saying was that his wee wee was getting hard and he wanted her to touch it.

            As they were in the middle of the hunt my dad's sled broke through the ice and he fell in the frigid water, hypothermia soon to set in. The young, beautiful french girl with the big hairy armpits was quick to think. She braided a rope out of her long brassy armpit hair and threw the lifeline to my father.

            Upon returning home we all rejoiced and feasted on Tim Horton's coffee and donuts while the french people put on a mime show, drank wine, ate cheese, and then we all had a massive french orgy like on those television shows you used to stumble upon late at night when your parents were fast asleep. But guess what!? Your parent's were not asleep, no, your dad was balls deep in your mother's vag and ps, that scary noise was not a monster under your bed, oh no, it was your mom gargling your father's hot steamy baby juice before she took that final gulp.

            Stereotypes - if we can't laugh at ourselves, laugh at others ;-)


            That's exactly how I envisioned your youth! Now I have confirmation.

            Comment

            • DatUtahGuy
              No R3VLimiter
              • Jan 2007
              • 3146

              #21
              The difference is that I would do nasty things to France's first lady.
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              • CAOSyAMOR
                Mod Crazy
                • Oct 2007
                • 789

                #22
                Originally posted by Fidhle007
                I lol'd. The sad part? I actually have a dogsled. Several in fact... :D
                really!? That's pretty cool.

                I actually never had one, but always thought it would be fun!
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                • E30 Cabrio
                  E30 Mastermind
                  • Oct 2006
                  • 1954

                  #23
                  Originally posted by CAOSyAMOR
                  Yes, but If I had a choice I know exactly which one I would be sticking my socialist weenie in. ;)

                  Yeah, and it wouldn't be the "Aunt Esther" from Sanford and Son lookin' bitch.
                  sigpic
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                  • mrsleeve
                    I waste 90% of my day here and all I got was this stupid title
                    • Mar 2005
                    • 16385

                    #24
                    Originally posted by Radiocammbodia
                    It's the PA leaking across the border. Hipster girls in philly have been sporting them.
                    Odd I spent a bunch of time in A.B.E. and had a few jobs down in Philly last summer too. Never saw them there. But yeah I can see the leaking across the state boarder going both ways, in that little town.
                    Originally posted by Fusion
                    If a car is the epitome of freedom, than an electric car is house arrest with your wife titty fucking your next door neighbor.
                    The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers that it can bribe the public with the public's money. -Alexis de Tocqueville


                    The Desire to Save Humanity is Always a False Front for the Urge to Rule it- H. L. Mencken

                    Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants.
                    William Pitt-

                    Comment

                    • Ray Smoodiver
                      Moderator
                      • Jun 2004
                      • 8809

                      #25
                      Originally posted by Fidhle007
                      I lol'd. The sad part? I actually have a dogsled. Several in fact... :D
                      That's because huskies rock.

                      I clocked mine at 67kph the other day, not bad for an 8 year old :D

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                      RTFM:http://www.r3vlimited.com/board/showthread.php?t=56950

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                      • thornado327i
                        E30 Addict
                        • Oct 2006
                        • 501

                        #26
                        And did you know - Carla Bruni became Sarkozy's wife JUST after the election. During the campaign he was more often seen with his wife (now ex-wife) promoting "family values"... Hungarians and their sense of humour...

                        Comment

                        • daniel
                          R3V OG
                          • Jul 2007
                          • 6703

                          #27
                          Originally posted by CAOSyAMOR
                          Well I remember growing up, eating seal blubber dipped in maple syrup, sitting in my parent's igloo, and my father would tell me grand stories of this french ship that sailed through the broken ice to our shore.

                          The boat was filled with stinky men who wore red and white striped shirts, and beautiful women with big hairy armpits. 'They ate a lot of baguettes', he told me. 'And smoked a lot of cigarettes through long skiny black sticks'.

                          Onde day as my dad was tying up the dogsled to go on a whale hunt, one of the beautiful french women with bigt hairy armpits asked if she could come along. My dad, not able to speak a word of french was more than happy to oblige and said 'Oui Oui!' What my dad was really saying was that his wee wee was getting hard and he wanted her to touch it.

                          As they were in the middle of the hunt my dad's sled broke through the ice and he fell in the frigid water, hypothermia soon to set in. The young, beautiful french girl with the big hairy armpits was quick to think. She braided a rope out of her long brassy armpit hair and threw the lifeline to my father.

                          Upon returning home we all rejoiced and feasted on Tim Horton's coffee and donuts while the french people put on a mime show, drank wine, ate cheese, and then we all had a massive french orgy like on those television shows you used to stumble upon late at night when your parents were fast asleep. But guess what!? Your parent's were not asleep, no, your dad was balls deep in your mother's vag and ps, that scary noise was not a monster under your bed, oh no, it was your mom gargling your father's hot steamy baby juice before she took that final gulp.

                          Stereotypes - if we can't laugh at ourselves, laugh at others ;-)
                          this story brought a tear to my eye...




                          ...and a lol to my mouth, or something.
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