need gf advice

[iwillhunt]

Still more pathetic.

Great contribution. Would read again.

I somehow missed out on the 2 months thing earlier. I say enjoy what you can out of the relationship, don't pressure her about anything, and if it doesn't work who cares, you're 19.

[E30 Cabrio]

Still more pathetic.

Yet you're hitting that "Refresh Browser" button like Ike hitting Tina back in the day...

[Dillinger]

Still more pathetic.

[Atreus]

this thread rocks. would read again.

+9 on r3v being the unofficial life counselor.

[E30 Cabrio]

You can also do what chicks often do:
Give her an ultimatum - She has to choose between you or the drugs.

If you do this, be warned that you are an amateur trying to play a game that chicks practically invented and they play it far better then you or I can imagine.

If you go this route, you will have to stick to your guns no matter what.

One moment of weakness (giving in to the waffleswaffleswaffleswaffleswaffles) will ruin any credibility and any leverage you ever had. If she knows she can break your will and your word with sex, or anything else (Crying, tears, etc...) you're done.

She will lose respect for you and once that happens, no more nookie for you from her once she knows she can easily manipulate you.

It's not easy "keeping your pimp hand strong" especially for a 19 year old getting his first taste of steady trim.

Just remember what happened to George Costanza - "I've got hand" and the subsequent reply of "you're going to need it!"

Of course, there is always the pre-emptive breakup. But like "the ultimatum" you have to have a strong will and you have to be able to outplay a game that women have all but mastered.

Not for the faint of heart.

[rhett325i]

I'm not gonna read through all the pages of this thread, so I don't know if someone already said this, but:

dump her. only two months in, it will hurt the least. The biggest mistake you could make is thinking you can change her. Find a girl who doesn't do drugs. There are plenty of hotties out there who don't.

My 2 cents

[SamE30e]

See this would be easy, if she wasn't so fucking hot

Coke head >< Super hot chick..

Conflicting in itself.

[Wudney]

I had a situation very much like this with my most recent ex... I'm 21 she's 19... drugs have never really been my thing, but I've always felt that a person's body is their own to do with as they please.. so as long as it doesn't get in the way: do what ever you want. I told her: ":if this leads to you messing us up or leads to you doing harm to yourself in some way: I'm done. OIther than that: be safe and have fun"

If you can live with it: live with it. If you can't... get out. 2 months is not long enough to feel bad about breaking up with a girl for a thing you feel is valid. Hell, two years isn't long enough to feel bad about it if you really have a moral issue with it.

So basically what you're saying is if she gets fat you'll dump her? Nice :D

[Wudney]

dude shes 19. i can personally tell you id smoke her out in a second if i knew she smoked. in my opinion you are doing the world a disservice by trying to take away one our hot 19 year old party chicks. you should be ashamed of yourself.

^ I agree 100%

OP, what you should be doing is encouraging the weed and coke, infact start bringing her presents like meth and bacardi 151. This way when she dumps your sorry ass she'll be a trainwreck by the time one of us get to her.

Serious though why'd you post personal GF issues on the internet? FAIL.

[learningcurve86]

I had a situation very much like this with my most recent ex... I'm 21 she's 19... drugs have never really been my thing, but I've always felt that a person's body is their own to do with as they please.. so as long as it doesn't get in the way: do what ever you want. I told her: ":if this leads to you messing us up or leads to you doing harm to yourself in some way: I'm done. OIther than that: be safe and have fun"

If you can live with it: live with it. If you can't... get out. 2 months is not long enough to feel bad about breaking up with a girl for a thing you feel is valid. Hell, two years isn't long enough to feel bad about it if you really have a moral issue with it.

[Atreus]

FFF FTW. she's 19. just bang it bro you guys are not getting fucking married.

[nineohfour]

dude shes 19. i can personally tell you id smoke her out in a second if i knew she smoked. in my opinion you are doing the world a disservice by trying to take away one our hot 19 year old party chicks. you should be ashamed of yourself.

[StereoInstaller1]

Ygpm.

[thereisnoyun]

dude... over reacting man... I'm pretty liberal here. I'm not for drugs at all. But seriously, shes ... 19. you say shes 25+ and thinking about marriage and she still screwing around with drugs... thats no good, but at 19? Just leave it be, its just be a phase.

Dont ever make a girl promise something, just because you think yo uare good to her. Women will promise everything and anything. You are just enabling them to lie and be super secretive about it.

but seriously with girls that does heavy drugs... I follow the three rules of college dating. I call it the Triple Fs. Find Fuck and Forget.

[Peterkaczynski]

Very well put, I wrote that really late last night and I completely overlooked the fact I didn't state that this was a phase. Even though I have a small reference to it, I didn't make the point I wanted to. I got overly involved with writing about the recovery process I completely forgot about the actual situation.

I will say this though, if it wasn't for my friends who worked hard to show me that I had a problem, I would not have come to that realization on my own as quickly. The first big step is admitting to yourself that you have a problem, but in order to do that you need other people to show you that you have a problem, only then can you actually step back. The only time ever in which an addict will come to the realization that they have a problem is when they hit rock bottom, I've seen it a couple times personally. The objective of "the rest of society" is to stop the addiction before if ever becomes that bad.

I edited my original post to clarify.

she did that and we're working on it, im spending more time with her and we're working on our relationship. weve been dating for 2 months but our foundation has been building for 3-4 months before we started being together. She realized that she has a problem and we will get over this phase and form here it seems like its going to be alright, hopefully this wont repeat