Call all parents - Sleep training?

[ParsedOut]

My wife and I need the help and advice of r3v parents. Our son is a year and a half and has always been a very light and finicky sleeper. Recently it has gotten out of control. He fights all naps and bed time is always a fight.

We've done hours of research on sleep training but none of it quite feels like the best thing for our child. There are studies done that show long periods of crying can really mess up a young child's brain.

We've tried (and are doing) the routine method of always doing the same thing before sleep.

He's been waking up at around 4am every day and wants to get up and play however he's obviously exhausted all morning and once he refuses his mid day nap he's a wreck by bedtime again.

We could use some advice or words of encouragement here.

*Edit, shit... I meant to say "Calling all parents" in the title.

[monticello]

I always ran a hose from the exhaust on my car into my daughters bedroom window. She slept like a rock.

[aaron.j]

I always ran a hose from the exhaust on my car into my daughters bedroom window. She slept like a rock.

This, and feed them Benadryl and unisom like it's going out of style.

[Ether-D]

Wow, I've almost forgotten all of those nights. I think my twins started sleeping through the night around 2 years. I've heard of babies 6 months old that did. You'll get it figured out. Mine are 4 and 7 now and it's great. They can brush their own teeth, wipe their own butts, even get themselves a cup of water for Pete's sakes. It will fly by. Doesn't seem like it now, but it really does.

And remember, never shake a baby.
I always wondered why everyone always said this. Then I had kids, and well, let's just say the thought crosses your mind. It did mine anyway. GLWBaby.

[e30rapidic]

when our little one was about 6 months old, we started the sleep training thing. No more rocking to sleep and running in there at every whimper in the night. We do the same routine at the same time every night (or at least as close to possible). 9 months later he's still in bed by 7:15 but doesn't always go to sleep, he'll stay up and babble to himself some nights. The last week or so he'll tell us night night when he's ready to go to bed or take a nap!

It's really a battle of wills, and yes it caused a couple of tense moments between the wife and I. The first night of "training" she left the house because she couldn't listen to the screams anymore and wanted to go back in there. I gave him 10 minutes, then would go back in to calm him down. He'd start back up again and I'd stretch it to 15. Thankfully he figured it out on the third night.

Although I consider ourselves lucky as I've heard some horror stories of kids fighting it well into their second year. He sleeps until about 7 am and usually takes an 1.5 hour nap about 1.

Do you think he's waking up hungry? What time does he eat/go to bed?

[Vtec?lol]

Do you sleep with him in your bed? If so then you need to work on ignoring him.
If he sleeps in his own room, try getting him to sleep with you guys. Not all kids respond to sleeping on their own positively. You can always work on weening them into their own beds and rooms as they get older. It's much easier than fighting sleep.

Have you tried mellow music? I let my daughter listen to smooth jazz or elevator music and she drops within 3 minutes. It's crazy. Getting them accustomed to the acoustical elements around them will help a bunch with light sleeping. I can play games or talk on the phone and my 15mo will stay sleep. We started when she was in the belly though so...

Every once in the while we will have one of those rough nights and sometimes it requires me to get up and play with her a while until she's ready to sleep again.

Diet- what are you feeding him throughout the day? You want to back off the fruits before dinner.

[Beau B]

We had similar issues with our son.. we don't like the cry it out method and everything else just wasn't working.. we found a book it was something by the sleep lady, Google it and her method worked for us. Took about 2-3 weeks from can't set him down to sleep to going down no issues. Her method is basically put himin the crib and sit next to the crib.. dont touch him or interact other then to reassure. . Warning first few times there will be crying but you aren't leaving him by himself to cry it out.. as he gets comfortable with you next to the crib, move the chair farther away.. and at each location when he is comfortable keep moving the chair until you are outside the door.. anyways.. this is just a general over view of it.. I would definitely recommend the book a lot of helpful tips etc.. good luck

[SpecM]

I need this too. my 21 m/o sleeps with my wife and i still.

[Beau B]

I found the book, the title is The Sleeplady's Goodnight Sleep Tight by Kim West.. we got it from Amazon

[G-Man the Visionary]

We are fortunate, 25 month old and 5 month old both slept through the night at 3-4 weeks (in pack and play), and in their own room (crib) at 3 months. We started sleep training them before they could train us, solid 10-12 hrs a night. When my 2 yr old can't sleep now, I just hold her and humm until she's out. Not sure of a solution to an already progressed situation like yours though.
Best of luck, OP.

[ParsedOut]

Wow, I've almost forgotten all of those nights. I think my twins started sleeping through the night around 2 years. I've heard of babies 6 months old that did. You'll get it figured out. Mine are 4 and 7 now and it's great. They can brush their own teeth, wipe their own butts, even get themselves a cup of water for Pete's sakes. It will fly by. Doesn't seem like it now, but it really does.

And remember, never shake a baby.
I always wondered why everyone always said this. Then I had kids, and well, let's just say the thought crosses your mind. It did mine anyway. GLWBaby.

Thanks :)

when our little one was about 6 months old, we started the sleep training thing. No more rocking to sleep and running in there at every whimper in the night. We do the same routine at the same time every night (or at least as close to possible). 9 months later he's still in bed by 7:15 but doesn't always go to sleep, he'll stay up and babble to himself some nights. The last week or so he'll tell us night night when he's ready to go to bed or take a nap!

It's really a battle of wills, and yes it caused a couple of tense moments between the wife and I. The first night of "training" she left the house because she couldn't listen to the screams anymore and wanted to go back in there. I gave him 10 minutes, then would go back in to calm him down. He'd start back up again and I'd stretch it to 15. Thankfully he figured it out on the third night.

Although I consider ourselves lucky as I've heard some horror stories of kids fighting it well into their second year. He sleeps until about 7 am and usually takes an 1.5 hour nap about 1.

Do you think he's waking up hungry? What time does he eat/go to bed?

I don't think he's hungry, usually eats around 4-5ish and goes to bed between 6 and 7.

Do you sleep with him in your bed? If so then you need to work on ignoring him.
If he sleeps in his own room, try getting him to sleep with you guys. Not all kids respond to sleeping on their own positively. You can always work on weening them into their own beds and rooms as they get older. It's much easier than fighting sleep.

Have you tried mellow music? I let my daughter listen to smooth jazz or elevator music and she drops within 3 minutes. It's crazy. Getting them accustomed to the acoustical elements around them will help a bunch with light sleeping. I can play games or talk on the phone and my 15mo will stay sleep. We started when she was in the belly though so...

Every once in the while we will have one of those rough nights and sometimes it requires me to get up and play with her a while until she's ready to sleep again.

Diet- what are you feeding him throughout the day? You want to back off the fruits before dinner.

He still co-sleeps occasionally but lately he's been sleeping in his own bed. We have a sound machine and that seemed to help a little. No music though, not a bad idea. Thanks.

We had similar issues with our son.. we don't like the cry it out method and everything else just wasn't working.. we found a book it was something by the sleep lady, Google it and her method worked for us. Took about 2-3 weeks from can't set him down to sleep to going down no issues. Her method is basically put himin the crib and sit next to the crib.. dont touch him or interact other then to reassure. . Warning first few times there will be crying but you aren't leaving him by himself to cry it out.. as he gets comfortable with you next to the crib, move the chair farther away.. and at each location when he is comfortable keep moving the chair until you are outside the door.. anyways.. this is just a general over view of it.. I would definitely recommend the book a lot of helpful tips etc.. good luck

I like this idea best out of all, I WILL read this book. Thanks!

[Beau B]

I hope it works for you guys as well as it did for us.. not going to lie it is still tough but the best route for my family.

[z6ne]

[xAZxE30x]

We really only ever had issues when he was sick. Or if he couldn't sleep or was fussy I would drive around the block for 10 minutes and that would seal the deal. He is now 3.5 and loves sleeping in now. We have the opposite issue of getting him to wake up for school!!

Baby number 2 is due in April so we shall see how that goes :)

[xAZxE30x]

We had similar issues with our son.. we don't like the cry it out method and everything else just wasn't working.. we found a book it was something by the sleep lady, Google it and her method worked for us. Took about 2-3 weeks from can't set him down to sleep to going down no issues. Her method is basically put himin the crib and sit next to the crib.. dont touch him or interact other then to reassure. . Warning first few times there will be crying but you aren't leaving him by himself to cry it out.. as he gets comfortable with you next to the crib, move the chair farther away.. and at each location when he is comfortable keep moving the chair until you are outside the door.. anyways.. this is just a general over view of it.. I would definitely recommend the book a lot of helpful tips etc.. good luck

This works great too! I never thought to moving further and further away but I would sit or lay down next to the crib and that would also work