Bats really dont freak me out

[Collin]

...but I just about shit myself when one dive bombed me while I was laying in bed about an hour ago.

I was watching TV and this little fucker flies in all like "Ya I know this is your apartment, but fuck you, manifest destiny bitch!".

I squeal like a girl on fire and run out of the room to grab a cardboard box thinking I could catch it.

You can't catch a bat with a cardboard box.

So I try calling the super to bring a fucking net, but the number is disconnected for some reason. I run to my neighbor and knock on the door asking if she knows another way to reach him.

No luck there, so I return to my locked door and find my keys on the other side of it.

So now I'm locked out with the Dark Knight's mascot shitting on my nice flannel sheets.

Neighbor lady is nice enough to drive me to my girls work and get her keys. I come back, and this little fuck stick is cold chillin on my blinds, like I wasn't about to fuck his day all kinds of up.

My inner cavemen takes over and I throw a shoe at the bitch, and miss. So he dive bombs me again and goes into hiding. I spend a half an hour creeping around before I find the little flying turd hiding behind a box of cheerios on my fridge.

I get my vacuum and try to suck him up, but this is some kind of mother fucking steroided up super bat and he just holds on to the tip of the thing and stares at me like "fuck you asshole, better men have tried".

So I knock him into the trash and tie the bag up before he flies up and makes me join the cast of Twilight.

Down the trash hole he goes, and voila, no more hairy ball sack in the sky.

Cliffs: I'm a bitch, anyone else fight off a bat?

[delfin]

First? I lol'd

[Tree18is]

...but I just about shit myself when one dive bombed me while I was laying in bed about an hour ago.

"Ya I know this is your apartment, but fuck you, manifest destiny bitch!".

But I have VS a bad before, We tried to catch it with a Ball basket from the driving range, and like dumb asses it touched us through the wide openness of the basket and the girl like screaming resulted..

[Turf1600]

Did it touch you?

[mrsleeve]

I LOLed

[atomic]

waffleswaffleswaffleswaffleswaffles...


:mrgreen:

[speedhop]

You've probably got aids now.

I lol'd.

[Alkasquawlik]

[Turf1600]

Okay, first off trashing it was the stupidest thing you could do.

Bats commonly carry rabies. You should have called animal control and had them come pick it up to be tested.

Secondarily, did it touch you at all? Their teeth are so small you might not have felt it bite. If it did, rabies doesn't show symptoms for a few days. When you do show symptoms, you're going to die. Think hard on whether or not it touched you. If it did, go get vaccinated. I've had to do it before - it's not too bad.

[z31maniac]

[Tree18is]

im still good with no rabies or HIV, and my bat was HUGE!!! I wanted to examine it : )

[Huff]

I squeal like a girl on fire and run out of the room to grab a cardboard box thinking I could catch it.

You can't catch a bat with a cardboard box.

A laughed.. Almost peed myself a little. Almost.

[soccer21]

Some people will have signs of hydrophobia...you won't be able to drink any water..but the foaming comes later..just remember it also depends on where you were bit..if you were bit closer to the upper extremity then the virus will travel to the cerebellar cortex quicker...final diagnosis is made by Brain Biopsy :) :) :) Ok no more medical jargon..

Just get yourself vaccinated..shots in the belly are fun :)

Chances of contracting HIV from a bat is RARE.

[Peterkaczynski]

lmao A+

[Gooch]

I once caught one in a towel after I somehow managed to get it into a bathroom. That was fun.

However, my one philosophy professor told us a story that involved him jumping up in the middle of the night...naked, swinging a tennis racket at a bat once.