Wickerman worst movie of all time?

[equate975]

I am going to spoil the movie, so if you really want to see this fucking piece of garbage don't read anymore. Also if you are offended by the word fuck, you better fuck off.

I just wasted over an hour of my life watching this pile of fucking dog shit. I can't believe that Nicolas Cage would star in this damn movie.

Its about NOTHING, he goes to an island and dies. Its 100% worthless. The whole damn time I kept saying to my self, "well something should happen now..." nope nothing happens.

Not to mention the story has pretty much no plot at all, the beginning with the girl who gets hit by a truck HAS NOTHING TO DO with any fucking part of the movie.

There was no ending, he just dies, its fucking stupid. Nothing gets resolved, they don't fucking explain anything, he just gets fucking burned to death in a big stick man.

Nothing makes sense, how the FUCK does everyone die? Who the hell fucking killed them? Why does everyone die? Who killed them? WHY THE FUCK IS EVERYONE DRESSED AS AN ANIMAL.

I thought it was going to be one of those movies where they drop hints and stuff and you have to figure it out, like the sixth sense, but NO. They don't explain half of the damn movie.

I also thought there was going to be some big spirit or some other phenomenon that would explain why magical shit happened, like when he needed the radio and coincidently right after he needs it its magically broken. Or why the fuck he has all these visions and hallucinations, THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYTHING, its just there to fuck with you and mock you for putting to much damn thought into a retarded movie.

The ending was by far the worst ever, I kept thinking, oh hes going to shoot them or something, wait his ammo is gone. Ok well hes going to fight them all then, nope they break his legs. Then as he is in the head of the stick man I figured the wife who was crying was finally going to rescue him, nope, then I thought the little girl wouldn't set him on fire, nope. Then I thought well for sure hes going to fly out or magically live and kick some ass, nope he dies. THEN IT JUST ENDS, WHAT THE FUCK.

I would rather fucking eat a pile of dog shit and burn my fucking eyes out with a match while eating my own legs off than fucking watch this horrible piece of shit ever again. I still am shocked at how fucking HORRIBLE this movie was. Fuck this piece of god damn shit, burn it in fucking hell.

[AndrewBird]

Now I want to see it just to see just how bad it actually is.

IMDB doesn't think much of it either:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0450345/

Rotten Tomatoes is even worse:

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/wicker_man/

And why did you decide to see this movie?

[Il Duce]

WHY THE FUCK IS EVERYONE DRESSED AS AN ANIMAL.

fucking ROFL.

[DEV0 E30]

So it's the worst movie ever. Too bad I normally like Cage movies.

But you know what?

This is the best review evAr!!!!!!!

The question!!!

DID YOU GET YOUR MONEY BACK!??!!

Yes, you can do that.

[Il Duce]

DID YOU GET YOUR MONEY BACK!??!!

Yes, you can do that.

i've found that if you have a hot GF this process goes much quicker.

[BimmerToad]

Now I want to see it just to see just how bad it actually is.

+1

Your review has peaked my interest. A girl getting plowed by a truck, people in animal suits, hallucinations, legs being broken ... those things alone sound like the premise for a good movie to me

[euroshark]

You passionate, passionate man...

[Digitalwave]

I quite liked the movie myself.

[Jand3rson]

Does anyone here know that this movie was a remake? Or that the original one, made in the 70's, was a hell of a lot better and made a hell of a lot more sense?

And I don't know how many times I've said it already, or how many more times I have to say it, but PLEASE keep profanity out of thread titles.

[Digitalwave]

I kind of like movies that don't make a lot of sense. I hate when the whole plot of a movie is completely spelled out so all the idiots that didn't get it can understand at the end of the movie.

[BDSax]

i think the worst movie ever is Open Water.

The last couple movies Cage has done hasnt had me impressed, i like him acting too.

[tonytony]

i think this movie sucked, waste of my 3.79 at blockbuster. but NIck Cage is one of my favorite actors

[Massive Lee]

The 1972 original "Wickerman" was interesting and very similar to an episode of "The Avengers" with a few sexy scenes. The remake is indeed totally bad as it lack the "strangeness" of the original and is very blend as most movies from the decade we live in. The whole movie is about a cult that celebrates their "Thanksgiving" to the Gods and need a "volunteer" to be sacrificed. I anticipated that movie for months and was extremely disapointed too. That being said, those who are fed up paying $10 for very bad movies should simply download them. In the worst case scenario, it is only a waste of bandwidth.

[tonytony]

volunteer used loosely, more like he was tricked into it then forced into sacrificing himself. I was disappointed, the "wickerman" reminded me of the burning man haha

[blunttech]

awesome review. i would never see a movie like that because its a rediculous premise and nicholas cage is a piece of shit actor. if you disagree you are wrong.
i think this was the best line in your review

"Also if you are offended by the word fuck, you better fuck off."