Thank YOU Chuck Norris.

[IanBMW]

That is SO awesome.

[fretburnr]

LOL hahahaa

Chuck Norris is able to have unprotected sex with Paris Hilton and not get the clap.

[parkerbink]

LOL hahahaa

Chuck Norris is able to have unprotected sex with Paris Hilton and not get the clap.

The rest I believe but THIS is IMPOSSIBLE!!!


lol

[DEV0 E30]

Vin Diesel does not actually run on diesel. He actually runs on a high octane fuel which is made by mixing environmentally friendly LPG with the souls of the damned.

[fretburnr]

In a sinister plot, Chuck Norris was actually the voice in the fields in the movie "The Field of Dreams." Using mind control, he made people believe "people will come" - and they did. The true ending of the movie was cut out due to blood and violence as he roundhouse kicked all the people that came.

Chuck Norris can play the bongo drums with his hands behind his back. He accomplishes this by leaning over them really close and flexing his pecs. The sweet rhythms he produces are the most potent form of aphrodisiac known to man.

[Avus E30]

When playing dodgeball, Chuck Norris will often light his opponents on fire, with lazer beams from his eyes.

[BS87]

rofl...

Flying saucers are nothing but Chuck Norris' victims being hurled through the atmosphere.

[golde30]

When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.

that one is the shiznit. i played oregon trail forever in elementary school...LOL

[golde30]

While attempting to grow a vagina one Thursday night in September, Chuck Norris accidently grew a third penis out of his fifth ball. At this point, he drank a beer.

Chuck Norris once went in for a physical, and during the examination, the doctor weighed him and found that he weighed a whopping 650 pounds. Shocked at how heavy Norris was, even with how much muscle he has, the doctor asked why he weighed so much. Having been met with this inquiry many times in his life Norris simply pointed at his crotch and said, “My penis.”

Chuck Norris's brain played Krang in the popular television show "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles". His brain was often caught sleeping with April O'Neil.

[Jordan325iC]

Thanks, I forgot how much I love Chuck Norris. Now I remember.

[ldsbeaker]

Why did this one die?

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity.



































Twice.

[MikeE30325i]

chuck norris isnt hung like a horse, horses are hung like chuck norris.


i used to have about 5 ba-jillion of these.

[M42Technik]

Chuck Norris once had a bad case of diarhea. The result, Boston, Massachusetts.

Best one ever. EVER.

"Anabolic steroids are a byproduct of Chuck Norris' urine."

[AdironRider]

Chuck Norris has sex with every woman in the world once a month. As a result, they bleed for a week afterwards.

[crunk3]

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".