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    Okay, I've got a decent one I guess.

    Back in the summer after I graduated high school, I was still dating my daughter's mother. One night, we decided to have a little adventure and have sex in my car. Nothing too unusual, right? WRONG. Road head is nice, but road SEX is even better. She's riding me while I'm e-braking my little Sunfire around these country dirt roads. Wonderful experience. We decide to stop and finish the deed. The deed was finally done did (she was the deed, I did her). WELL, right as soon as I get up, I see this truck pass us. It stops about a hundred or so feet away and starts to reverse/turn around. We're like "OH SHIT! We gotta go!" because people like to mess with those who are doing the dirty out in the country. We don't have time to get dressed, so I leap up into the front seat butt-ass naked, start the car and try to peace the fuck out. Wouldn't ya know it, the truck gives chase. I'm flying down country roads e-braking at every turn. Finally, we lose them and go to a road to get dressed. Not as good as some other stories, but still a good one.
    88 325i Cabrio
    04 Neon SRT-4

    Originally posted by MrBurgundy
    If R3v was a dude, it would pick up a tinder date naked, with a raging boner, drunk, in an e30 with a shitty interior, a missing sunroof panel, explaining how its a classic while staring at the tinder date's tits.

    Comment


      That's a good one haha. Don't be scared, tell your stories.


      Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
      Originally posted by wholepailofwater
      Q
      :devil:


      WTB: Dove Grey e36 Front Door Panels (2 door)

      Comment


        Alright, this is the absolute craziest sex related story I have ever witnessed or heard about. (Disclaimer, I was in a committed relationship at the time, and did not participate in the fun).

        This was back in my USMC days, when I was stationed out in San Diego. I had a buddy who was in another unit, who had recently returned from a deployment overseas.

        (Side note, we road tripped his 95 M3 from Arkansas to Cali when he got back. Was a super cool experience)

        Anyways, this story occurs shortly after he returned, like within a couple of weeks. I was on base, relaxing one Saturday night. He texts me and tells me to head over to his room for some beers and to shoot the shit.

        I oblige, and make my way over to his room (about 1/2) mile away. Where I was stationed, most Marines had their own tiny private room that shared an even smaller common area with another room. That's how my buddies room was laid out as well.

        So, I get to his room, crack open a cold one, and start BS'ing about his experiences, and BMW's, and what he's gonna do with all of his cash.

        We head outside to his second story balcony area (each balcony area served 4 rooms) and we notice some guys outside. Everyone is friendly, so my buddy shares some cigarettes and we shoot the shit some more. Sharing beers with these guys who just spent 7 months in the sandbox.

        Now, my buddy gets texted by his roommate (the guy he shares the common area with) telling him that he found these two girls out in SD and that he was headed back ASAP. He tells my buddy that he is getting blown in this taxi by both chicks as he is headed back to base. We call BS. He happily sends picture proof.

        My buddy is getting all excited, obviously. Sounds like his roommate wants to share the fun with him.

        Words and the pictures spread to every guy on the balcony. Shit is going down!

        A little while later, they show up, two young blonde girls in tow. My buddies roommate attempts to take them straight to his room to take both of these chicks to poundtown.

        But these two girls are not having it. They do not want to head to his room.

        Yet.

        One girl, slightly intoxicated, grabs a random guy smoking a cigarette right in his dick. Just grabs a chunk of his cock and yells "I WANT YOU TO FUCK MY FACE!"

        This immediately sends shit into overdrive. The other girls whips her tits out and throws her shirt off of the second story balcony. We hustle these two crazy horny bitches and every dude attached to them into the original guys room, knowing that we can't have bitches yelling at the top of their lungs to have their throat holes rammed by cocks outside, as the Duty would shut this party down immediately.

        People are naked instantly. Now, I don't know if you have ever seen Marines and the way they act after a 7 month deployment, but HOL-E-SHIT. These guys were ravenous.

        I was afraid they were going to eat these girls alive, literally. There are Eiffel Towers, double penetration, ass-to-mouth, all in what appeared to be 30 seconds.

        And these two young ladies are absolutely loving it! Begging for more, yelling for crazy shit like 3 cocks in their ass at once.

        At this point, guys are showing up left and right. Word spreads quick when shit like this goes down. This tiny room, like 7 ft by 10 ft, is packed full of human bodies. Clothes are everywhere. And there are people out on the balcony, waiting to get in.

        Girls continue begging for more people to fuck them, like the 15 guys in there aren't enough!!

        I have never heard a women ask to be fucked more viciously and un-endingly than these two ladies. I could not comprehend how bad they wanted to be used.

        Guys would walk out, completely naked, and just start high five-ing everyone.

        When one came out, one, sometimes two, went in.

        It was literal fucking insanity.

        More and more and more people show up. Dozens, if not 100 guys.

        Every single one of them played their part in ravaging these two girls. At one point I work my way into the common area and jump up on the counter. I look into this room, full of human bodies, and it is unlike anything I had ever seen. At one point one of the girls crowd surfs from one dick and one side of the room, to another dick on the other side of the room.

        Insanity.

        This continues for what seems like forever, with no lose of enthusiasm. I was doing my best to keep an eye out for the Duty, but like a train wreck, I couldn't look away for very long.

        Eventually, the shit gets too far out of hand and we have to start pushing people to bounce to someplace else to keep from attracting too much attention. This is no easy task, but after busting a nut, most of these guys were pretty easy to deal with.

        Finally, the night ends with these girls passed out in the original guys room, surrounded by 5 or 6 random guys, all butt naked. The floor is completely covered in clothes, mashed into the ground. There is semen and sweat and spit everywhere. Fucking stank like satans asshole in the room too.

        I finally left, just about unable to comprehend the experience that I had witnessed.

        My buddy and his unit talked about that shit non-stop. Until that is, that they found out that these two young ladies were the daughters of high ranking enlisted men. That kept the stories pretty damn quiet immediately. Ain't nobody willing to get caught participating in the annihilation of a SGT Maj's daughter.

        Phew. Memories.
        My previous build (currently E30-less)
        http://www.r3vlimited.com/board/showthread.php?t=170390

        A 2016 Toyota Tacoma TRD 4x4 Offroad in Inferno is my newest obsession

        Comment


          WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOA

          Y'all need jesus
          Originally posted by wholepailofwater
          Q
          :devil:


          WTB: Dove Grey e36 Front Door Panels (2 door)

          Comment


            PLOT TWIST

            those girls had herpes
            Simon
            Current Car:
            -2017 i3 REx, 21st Century E30
            -1975 Alfa Romeo Giulia Nuova Super 1300, the never-ending name & project



            Make R3V Great Again -2020

            Comment


              Originally posted by 2mAn View Post
              PLOT TWIST

              those girls had herpes


              I just loled so hard


              Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
              Originally posted by wholepailofwater
              Q
              :devil:


              WTB: Dove Grey e36 Front Door Panels (2 door)

              Comment


                Originally posted by MR E30 325is View Post
                Alright, this is the absolute craziest sex related story I have ever witnessed or heard about. (Disclaimer, I was in a committed relationship at the time, and did not participate in the fun).

                This was back in my USMC days, when I was stationed out in San Diego. I had a buddy who was in another unit, who had recently returned from a deployment overseas.

                (Side note, we road tripped his 95 M3 from Arkansas to Cali when he got back. Was a super cool experience)

                Anyways, this story occurs shortly after he returned, like within a couple of weeks. I was on base, relaxing one Saturday night. He texts me and tells me to head over to his room for some beers and to shoot the shit.

                I oblige, and make my way over to his room (about 1/2) mile away. Where I was stationed, most Marines had their own tiny private room that shared an even smaller common area with another room. That's how my buddies room was laid out as well.

                So, I get to his room, crack open a cold one, and start BS'ing about his experiences, and BMW's, and what he's gonna do with all of his cash.

                We head outside to his second story balcony area (each balcony area served 4 rooms) and we notice some guys outside. Everyone is friendly, so my buddy shares some cigarettes and we shoot the shit some more. Sharing beers with these guys who just spent 7 months in the sandbox.

                Now, my buddy gets texted by his roommate (the guy he shares the common area with) telling him that he found these two girls out in SD and that he was headed back ASAP. He tells my buddy that he is getting blown in this taxi by both chicks as he is headed back to base. We call BS. He happily sends picture proof.

                My buddy is getting all excited, obviously. Sounds like his roommate wants to share the fun with him.

                Words and the pictures spread to every guy on the balcony. Shit is going down!

                A little while later, they show up, two young blonde girls in tow. My buddies roommate attempts to take them straight to his room to take both of these chicks to poundtown.

                But these two girls are not having it. They do not want to head to his room.

                Yet.

                One girl, slightly intoxicated, grabs a random guy smoking a cigarette right in his dick. Just grabs a chunk of his cock and yells "I WANT YOU TO FUCK MY FACE!"

                This immediately sends shit into overdrive. The other girls whips her tits out and throws her shirt off of the second story balcony. We hustle these two crazy horny bitches and every dude attached to them into the original guys room, knowing that we can't have bitches yelling at the top of their lungs to have their throat holes rammed by cocks outside, as the Duty would shut this party down immediately.

                People are naked instantly. Now, I don't know if you have ever seen Marines and the way they act after a 7 month deployment, but HOL-E-SHIT. These guys were ravenous.

                I was afraid they were going to eat these girls alive, literally. There are Eiffel Towers, double penetration, ass-to-mouth, all in what appeared to be 30 seconds.

                And these two young ladies are absolutely loving it! Begging for more, yelling for crazy shit like 3 cocks in their ass at once.

                At this point, guys are showing up left and right. Word spreads quick when shit like this goes down. This tiny room, like 7 ft by 10 ft, is packed full of human bodies. Clothes are everywhere. And there are people out on the balcony, waiting to get in.

                Girls continue begging for more people to fuck them, like the 15 guys in there aren't enough!!

                I have never heard a women ask to be fucked more viciously and un-endingly than these two ladies. I could not comprehend how bad they wanted to be used.

                Guys would walk out, completely naked, and just start high five-ing everyone.

                When one came out, one, sometimes two, went in.

                It was literal fucking insanity.

                More and more and more people show up. Dozens, if not 100 guys.

                Every single one of them played their part in ravaging these two girls. At one point I work my way into the common area and jump up on the counter. I look into this room, full of human bodies, and it is unlike anything I had ever seen. At one point one of the girls crowd surfs from one dick and one side of the room, to another dick on the other side of the room.

                Insanity.

                This continues for what seems like forever, with no lose of enthusiasm. I was doing my best to keep an eye out for the Duty, but like a train wreck, I couldn't look away for very long.

                Eventually, the shit gets too far out of hand and we have to start pushing people to bounce to someplace else to keep from attracting too much attention. This is no easy task, but after busting a nut, most of these guys were pretty easy to deal with.

                Finally, the night ends with these girls passed out in the original guys room, surrounded by 5 or 6 random guys, all butt naked. The floor is completely covered in clothes, mashed into the ground. There is semen and sweat and spit everywhere. Fucking stank like satans asshole in the room too.

                I finally left, just about unable to comprehend the experience that I had witnessed.

                My buddy and his unit talked about that shit non-stop. Until that is, that they found out that these two young ladies were the daughters of high ranking enlisted men. That kept the stories pretty damn quiet immediately. Ain't nobody willing to get caught participating in the annihilation of a SGT Maj's daughter.

                Phew. Memories.

                thats what i'm talkin' about! that there is a fucking story!!! wow.


                imagine if one of them got knocked up from that? uh....daddy, i need to get a paternity test from like....80 guys.
                sigpic
                Gigitty Gigitty!!!!

                88 cabrio becoming alpina b6 3.5s transplanted s62
                92 Mtech 2 cabrio alpinweiss 770 code
                88 325ix coupe manual lachsilber/cardinal
                88 325ix coupe manual diamondschwartz/natur
                87 e30 m3 for parts lachsilber/cardinal(serial number 7)
                12 135i M sport cabrio grey/black

                Comment


                  This thread always delivers...
                  Originally posted by wholepailofwater
                  Q
                  :devil:


                  WTB: Dove Grey e36 Front Door Panels (2 door)

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by flyboyx View Post

                    imagine if one of them got knocked up from that? uh....daddy, i need to get a paternity test from like....80 guys.
                    Imagine the Maury Povich show with the whole freakin platoon up there
                    Simon
                    Current Car:
                    -2017 i3 REx, 21st Century E30
                    -1975 Alfa Romeo Giulia Nuova Super 1300, the never-ending name & project



                    Make R3V Great Again -2020

                    Comment


                      and non of them are the father
                      Originally posted by wholepailofwater
                      Q
                      :devil:


                      WTB: Dove Grey e36 Front Door Panels (2 door)

                      Comment


                        ^lol
                        1990 325i
                        2004 330i Individual 6-speed
                        sigpic


                        Comment


                          OR..... 5 of the little swimmers won somehow and she gets quintuplets from 5 different fathers ;D
                          88 325i Cabrio
                          04 Neon SRT-4

                          Originally posted by MrBurgundy
                          If R3v was a dude, it would pick up a tinder date naked, with a raging boner, drunk, in an e30 with a shitty interior, a missing sunroof panel, explaining how its a classic while staring at the tinder date's tits.

                          Comment


                            Or they can't get pregnant, because they used to be DUDES
                            Originally posted by wholepailofwater
                            Q
                            :devil:


                            WTB: Dove Grey e36 Front Door Panels (2 door)

                            Comment


                              these are all valid scenarios that would play out on Maury
                              Simon
                              Current Car:
                              -2017 i3 REx, 21st Century E30
                              -1975 Alfa Romeo Giulia Nuova Super 1300, the never-ending name & project



                              Make R3V Great Again -2020

                              Comment


                                Haha you guys are precious to me.
                                My previous build (currently E30-less)
                                http://www.r3vlimited.com/board/showthread.php?t=170390

                                A 2016 Toyota Tacoma TRD 4x4 Offroad in Inferno is my newest obsession

                                Comment

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