This is: Best of Craigslist Ads

[slammin.e28]

Flagged for removal :(

...and that my friend is why we COPY, PASTE, and QUOTE the text and pics.

Let this be a lesson to all of you! This thread is useless with just dead Clist links. they don't last forever.

Carry on.

[DER E30]

http://raleigh.craigslist.org/cto/4316666400.html

Flagged for removal :(

[volvolover]

http://raleigh.craigslist.org/cto/4316666400.html

[flyboyx]

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/mod/3781647774.html

i laughed my cack off!

Drunk girl on my lawn - m4w
There I was, just yesterday, I can remember it so clearly. I woke up around 2 AM to take a nice fat leak when I noticed your squeeky giggle outside of my window. I looked out my window half naked as an odd mix of shock, disgust, pity and blush washed over me.

Not only were you a stunning redhead just a little shorter then me with, what looked like, a curtain and drapery matching combo, but you were also taking a dump and piss on my lawn at the same time. For that I have to give you props, I don't think I've ever achieved that level of toilet mastery.

I immediately came out to see if you were alright or needed a ride home, seeing as this town isn't exactly well suited for, what I'm guessing to be, an 18-21 drunk girl at 2 in the morning, but me coming out in a bathrobe and asking apparently scared you because you started running with a turd still sticking out of your ass and dove headfirst into my car, leaving a dent in it.

I told you to hold on as I was gonna shut off the car alarm and get you an ice pack but I'm not sure if you heard. What I am sure of though is that you sat on the trunk of my car smearing shit all over it, took off your shoes, left your half full smirnoff bottle and ran like hell.

Normally I wouldn't let a girl shit all over my things and put a dent in my car until we've gotten on a first name basis but for you I think we could work it out. You know where I live.

Location: Modesto Ca
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

[Tamataz]

http://nh.craigslist.org/cto/4200619044.html


I'm not going to lie to you guys; I want this car.

Master trolling car

[Sea Aych]

lol
http://sandiego.craigslist.org/csd/cto/4204166896.html

I love how the tags take up 75% of ad itself

[Dj Buttchug]

lol

http://sandiego.craigslist.org/csd/cto/4204166896.html

[flyboyx]

http://nh.craigslist.org/cto/4200619044.html


I'm not going to lie to you guys; I want this car.

um.... why?

[phreshkid]

http://nh.craigslist.org/cto/4200619044.html

I'm not going to lie to you guys; I want this car.

[McGyver]

that MG ad is too epic.

[stefennn]

That hotrod e21, is pretty sick, just needs a new hood and other small things and would be a blast to drive

[ficklerx]

http://savannah.craigslist.org/cto/4188036290.html

Ultimate Hipstermobile - $3200 (Savannah)
1976 MG Midget odometer: 109700 manual transmission

Imagine: You've just finished a hard day slapping together artisan birdhouses from reclaimed Australian clapboard siding and locally forged, hand-hammered nails. You decide to head over to the Legion to throw back a few tall-boys and lament the current state of society, so you hop over the door of your 1976 MG Midget and roar across town with your hair flying behind you like a scene in a Wes Anderson film. As you pull up to the curb, some cute boy or girl hails you from the porch: "Nice. Who makes that?" You respond, "Oh, my car? Some old British company, you've probably never heard of them." Which is true, because it was built by British Leyland and you've probably never heard of them either.

Sound good? There's more. This baby has a tape deck stereo, perfect for listening to your vintage cassette collection with a friend. And when you drop your friend off, there is a line-in jack so you can plug in your phone and finally admit to yourself that all those tapes still sound like shit. Do you know that neighbor of yours with a leather jacket and a café bike? Dispense your condescending looks through the window of this car, and he'll sell his motorcycle and move away. I mean, does anyone even ride those things anymore? This car has three windshield wipers. The gas cap isn't in the right place. It has a luggage rack. It has so much hipster cred that you can drive it through a rack of fixies* and nobody will look twice.

There's a trunk too, so those days of wobbling home from Kroger with your groceries strung out on your handlebars like some kind of quadruple hobo bindle are over. It'll hold your 30 rack and box of wine with space to spare for your portfolio and stack of vegan buffalo steaks. And there's a top you can raise to drive through the rain, letting your disdain wash over all those bicycle riders who are forced to brave the elements.

Why should you bow down to corporate America by driving one of their robot-built, made-in-china, dime-a-dozen shitboxes when you could cruise in this one-of-a-kind** yellow convertible that was hand-built in England by a man who was probably a little drunk. Based on current standards, you can probably call it an artisan car. Someone once called it the cronut of automobiles, but they were obviously a little behind the times. Still, you get the idea. Or you will, if you're cool enough to buy it.

$3200 or best offer. I'll take cash, or a bank check or wire transfer from your parents bank account. Contact me by email.

* don't do this.
** not in any way one-of-a-kind

[krazcustoms]

http://scranton.craigslist.org/cto/4170678467.html

[bmwman91]

I forgot about this one...not on the best-of list, but it was one that I enjoyed writing. No $20 sadly. At least nobody tried to get me to meet them at night by their U-Store unit.

These are free, on the condition that you take them all.

- 2 x 50W equivalent 2700K (warm white)
- 1 x 75W equivalent 6500K (bright / daylight white, VERY white)
- 5 x 50W equivalent 6500K (bright / daylight white, VERY white)

If you want to give me $20 for them, that would be cool, but they are free if you are feeling cheap & just want some bulbs. I won't bother you about money if you take the bulbs.

They ALL work.

The 2700K bulbs have an unknown amount of time on them, and are good for living room use and that sort of thing.

The 6500K ones all have less than 2 hours of use. I got them thinking that super white light would kick ass & make things in my apartment feel like daytime, but they just made me feel like I was in my office, which led to disappointment at the fact that my apartment does not have a luxurious handicapped stall for #2'ing purposes like my office does. These bulbs would be GREAT in a garage, project/hobby room, meth lab, illegal organ harvesting operation in a U-Store unit, or a childrens' craft area.

If you are interested, I will box these bad boys up and leave them under my apartment's stairs and you can pick them up at your leisure. No, I will not meet you at night near your U-Store unit. I guess that sort of makes the $20 thing a little more difficult. If you put a $20 bill under a rock or something when you leave, you are a true champion among men.

Fuck it, just take them.

[bmwman91]

dude!!!! come on man! how the fuck do you find shit like this?????!!!

its pretty goddam funny, but....fuck!

Hey, for $5M it's all good right?

But really, it is years of Bimmerforums OT and friends in grad school avoiding their thesis papers lol.