Nonsense Thread

[randomtask37]

Staying at my gf's parents house for the holidays. They are the no alcohol religious type. I came home drunk last night at 8 pm. Went strait to bed. Gf chewed me out for not hanging out with the family. She was out with me and knew I was drunk. I said I wasn't going to hang out cuz I couldn't hide my drunkenness. She said that's stupid. I said its like trying to walk a strait line drunk. She said that was a bad analogy. ... I thought it was a perfect analogy... And fell asleep

[Roysneon]

That's nonsense.

[Roysneon]

I really like how your car looks though.

[randomtask37]

Lol. Thanks

[flyboyx]

yesterday, my wife and i went christmas shopping at target. after about 30 minutes of looking through the home goods section, i started to get really bored. i might as well have been looking at tampons the entire time. i decided to rip a massive, loud, stinky fart. i am pretty sure it was loud enough to be heard about 3 or 4 isles over. i then proceeded to blame it on my wife. "HONEY!!!!!! GEEEEZZZ!!!!!!" sort of thing. she has a great sense of humor but was also massively embarrassed. the two of us, laughing like kindergarteners, went running out of the isle and around the corner. as i made the first 90 degree turn past the next isle, i saw in the corner of my eye a couple in their late fifties laughing their asses off at us.

anyway, mission accomplished. she wanted to get the hell out of the store right after that.

[henryki]

^^ hahaha thats comedy.

Walked into a Target bathroom with my buddy on the way out to Dubfest car show in Pasadena, a dude was in the stall, we both went to the urinals and I started to talk about what I was going to get for my R3v Secret Santa, I mentioned a black dildo, then my friend continued to say "oh like the one we used last night?" just going along with it I said "oh yeah just like that one" Friend: "Do you have it with you?" me: "Um yeah of course" finishing up at urinals friend slams both hands against the stall, then the guy inside the stall lets out a nasty fart and we both lose it and run out laughing our asses off.

[henryki]

Also I got this as a group message earlier today.

[Farbin Kaiber]

It's nonsense that I'm tired of snow and winter is just starting.

And that's a duh.

Penis sized nipple so you can give her the workin's while working the tongue AND getting a blowjob from her one legged sister.

[ST1G]

Would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or a Horse size duck?

Wow that was tight last night. Like a hotdog in a hall way; but the exact opposite.

[E30 Wagen]

Here are some more great inventions that changed the world: casseroles, napkins, joysticks, tyrannosaurus rex, molars, fire trucks, question marks, blueprints, sandals, ctrl+alt+del, apples, rocks, decimals.

But, is anything really ever invented, or just discovered?

[lambo]

But, is anything really ever invented, or just discovered?

I would say invented. Discovered implies that it already exists and just needs to be found. The guy who invented mouse traps didn't go out and find them in the wild, he had to design them.

[henryki]

i feel like my entire life so far could go on this thread. I guess it makes sense being 20 next month and in my second year of college..

[E30_Pare]

necessity is the mother of invention.

[Exodus_2pt0]

My daughter just made tomato soup in her diaper, and was not happy.

My wife says it was more like pea soup.... But what to I know, I'm colorblind.


Not THAT kind of color blind, yes I do see more than black and white... Though black and white would make for an interesting life.

[henryki]

My vet neighbor was telling me a story about when they captured vietcong prisoners and put them on the helicopter they would start questioning them. They wouldn't say a word so at 4,000 feet his crew would throw one out to see if they could "fly" then another, one at a time until someone decided to start talking. 'Merica.