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    Give that douche the what for!

    Good luck paulo, I'm sure you'll get it fixed. At least its a spare.

    sigpic

    Comment


      Originally posted by Austin! View Post
      Tell us how you really feel...
      Do you really want that bowl of fuck spilled?
      -Andy

      Comment


        Originally posted by dashboardmonkey View Post
        Do you really want that bowl of fuck spilled?

        yesss please go on :D
        Simon
        Current Car:
        -2002 MR2 Spyder


        Make R3V Great Again -2020

        Comment


          Originally posted by dashboardmonkey View Post
          Do you really want that bowl of fuck spilled?
          Originally posted by 2man View Post
          yesss please go on :D
          Beat me to it, damn you. But yes, I would love to hear what you're really thinking!
          Autobahn Motorsport - Portland, Oregon - BMW restoration + service
          @autobahnmotorsport - 503.206.7905
          '88 M5 | '89 330is

          "The car makes it possible, but the driver makes it happen." - Jim Levie

          Comment


            Ok, this girl is very book smart. When it comes to common sense, she fails miserably. Jesus fuck. It pisses me off to even think about it. She has a dog that will not quit biting people. This fucking mutt make me nervous. No one has the sack to do the foot work to have her put down (the dog that is, although at times i think she should be taken out and shot like a race horse with a broken leg) She is living here rent free and is lazy as fuck. Dog shit all over in the front yard. Fucking gross. Walk that fucking dog, you could definately use the exercise. She sits in the living room (my bedroom door is in the living room) and smokes pot. I don't smoke that shit and to be honest it makes me sick to my stomach. I wake up every fucking morning to the smell of her smoking cigarettes, i don't smoke. I get up to take a piss and when i walk out im like yuck, the smell of a cigarette. Her reply, oh it stinks huh? Then takes a fucking drag and blows it my direction. Fucking waffleswaffleswaffleswaffles almost got stabbed in the face. Her wii came up missing, she tried to say i took it to sell. Fuck no bitch. If i'm gonna steal something from you it's gonna be something worth the risk of getting caught, not your fucking wii.

            I just wanna ask her one question most times: "nobody has killed you yet?"
            -Andy

            Comment


              Some of you have heard this, i didnt hear it until yesterday.

              Are You Having a Bad Day?

              For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone, don't take that bad day out on someone you know.

              Instead, take it out on someone unfriendly who you don't know!

              Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it.

              A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?"

              I politely said, "This is Patrick Hannifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?"

              Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude.

              I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had transposed the last two digits incorrectly.

              After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided to call it again.

              When the same person once more answered, I yelled "You're a jackass!" and hung up.

              Next to his phone number I wrote the word "jackass," and put it in my desk drawer.

              Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up.

              He'd answer, and I'd yell, "You're a jackass!"

              It would always cheer me up.

              Later in the year, the phone company introduced caller ID.

              This was a real disappointment for me; I would have to stop calling the jackass.

              Then, one day, I had an idea.

              I dialed his number, then heard his voice, "Hello."

              I made up a name. "Hi, this is Mike Smith with the sales office of the telephone company and I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with our caller ID program?"

              He went, "No!" and slammed the phone down.

              I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're a jackass!"

              The reason I took the time to tell you this story is to show you how if there's ever anything really bothering you, you can do something about it --just dial my good ol' friend, the jackass, at 555-1111.

              [Keep reading! It gets better.]

              An old lady at the mall really took her time pulling out of the parking place. I didn't think she was ever going to leave.

              Finally, she got the car in reverse and she began to move ... very slowly backing out of the slot.

              I backed up a little more to give her plenty of room to pull out.

              Great, I thought, she's finally leaving.

              All of a sudden this black Camaro comes flying up the parking aisle in the wrong direction and pulls into her space.

              I started honking my horn and yelling, "You can't just do that, Buddy. I was here first!"

              The guy climbed out of his Camaro completely ignoring me. He walked toward the mall as if he didn't even hear me.

              I thought to myself, "This guy's a jackass!" There sure a lot of jackasses in this world.

              Then I noticed he had a "For Sale" sign in the back window of his car. I wrote down the number then hunted for another place to park.

              A couple of days later, I'm at home sitting at my desk. I had just gotten off the phone after calling 555-1111 and yelling, "You're a jackass!" (It's really easy to call him now since I have his number on speed dial.)

              I noticed the phone number of the guy with the black Camaro lying on my desk and thought I'd better call this guy, too.

              After a couple rings, someone answered the phone and said, "Hello."

              I said, "Is this the man with the black Camaro for sale?"

              "Yes, it is."

              "Can you tell me where I can see it?"

              "Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th street. It's a yellow house and the car's parked right out front."

              I said, "What's your name?"

              "My name is Don Hansen."

              "When's a good time to catch you, Don?"

              "I'm home in the evenings."

              "Listen Don, can I tell you something?"

              "Yes."

              "Don, you're a jackas re You Having a Bad Day?

              For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone, don't take that bad day out on someone you know.

              Instead, take it out on someone unfriendly who you don't know!

              Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it.

              A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?"

              I politely said, "This is Patrick Hannifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?"

              Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude.

              I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had transposed the last two digits incorrectly.

              After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided to call it again.

              When the same person once more answered, I yelled "You're a jackass!" and hung up.

              Next to his phone number I wrote the word "jackass," and put it in my desk drawer.

              Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up.

              He'd answer, and I'd yell, "You're a jackass!"

              It would always cheer me up.

              Later in the year, the phone company introduced caller ID.

              This was a real disappointment for me; I would have to stop calling the jackass.

              Then, one day, I had an idea.

              I dialed his number, then heard his voice, "Hello."

              I made up a name. "Hi, this is Mike Smith with the sales office of the telephone company and I'm just calling to see if you're familiar with our caller ID program?"

              He went, "No!" and slammed the phone down.

              I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're a jackass!"

              The reason I took the time to tell you this story is to show you how if there's ever anything really bothering you, you can do something about it --just dial my good ol' friend, the jackass, at 555-1111.

              [Keep reading! It gets better.]

              An old lady at the mall really took her time pulling out of the parking place. I didn't think she was ever going to leave.

              Finally, she got the car in reverse and she began to move ... very slowly backing out of the slot.

              I backed up a little more to give her plenty of room to pull out.

              Great, I thought, she's finally leaving.

              All of a sudden this black Camaro comes flying up the parking aisle in the wrong direction and pulls into her space.

              I started honking my horn and yelling, "You can't just do that, Buddy. I was here first!"

              The guy climbed out of his Camaro completely ignoring me. He walked toward the mall as if he didn't even hear me.

              I thought to myself, "This guy's a jackass!" There sure a lot of jackasses in this world.

              Then I noticed he had a "For Sale" sign in the back window of his car. I wrote down the number then hunted for another place to park.

              A couple of days later, I'm at home sitting at my desk. I had just gotten off the phone after calling 555-1111 and yelling, "You're a jackass!" (It's really easy to call him now since I have his number on speed dial.)

              I noticed the phone number of the guy with the black Camaro lying on my desk and thought I'd better call this guy, too.

              After a couple rings, someone answered the phone and said, "Hello."

              I said, "Is this the man with the black Camaro for sale?"

              "Yes, it is."

              "Can you tell me where I can see it?"

              "Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th street. It's a yellow house and the car's parked right out front."

              I said, "What's your name?"

              "My name is Don Hansen."

              "When's a good time to catch you, Don?"

              "I'm home in the evenings."

              "Listen Don, can I tell you something?"

              "Yes."

              "Don, you're a jackass!" And I slammed the phone down.

              After I hung up, I added Don Hansen's number to my speed dialer.

              For a while, things seemed to be going better for me.

              Now, when I had a problem, I had two jackasses to call.

              Then, after several weeks of calling the jackasses and hanging up on them, it just wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be.

              I gave the problem some serious thought and came up with a solution.

              First, I had my phone dial Jackass #1.

              A man answered nicely saying, "Hello."

              I yelled "You're a jackass!", but I didn't hang up.

              The jackass said, "Are you still there?"

              I said, "Yeah."

              He said, "Stop calling me."

              I said, "No."

              He said, "What's your name, Pal?"

              I said, "Don Hansen."

              He said "Where do you live?"

              "1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and my black Camaro's parked out front."

              "I'm coming over right now, Don. You'd better start saying your prayers."

              "Yeah, like I'm really scared, Jackass!" and I hung up.

              Then I called Jackass #2.

              He answered, "Hello."

              I said, "Hello, Jackass!"

              He said, "If I ever find out who you are..."

              "You'll what?"

              "I'll kick your butt."

              "Well, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now, Jackass!" And I hung up.

              Then I picked up the phone and called the police. I told them I was at 1802 West 34th Street and that I was going to kill my brother-in-law as soon as he got home.

              I made another quick call to Channel 13 about the gang war going down on West 34th Street.

              After that, I climbed into my car and headed over to 34th Street to watch the whole thing.

              Glorious! Watching two Jackasses throwing punches and kicking one another in front of 6 squad cars, a police helicopter, and channel 13 news cameras!!!

              It was one of the greatest experiences of my life!

              Name withheld to protect the guilty. s!" And I slammed the phone down.

              After I hung up, I added Don Hansen's number to my speed dialer.

              For a while, things seemed to be going better for me.

              Now, when I had a problem, I had two jackasses to call.

              Then, after several weeks of calling the jackasses and hanging up on them, it just wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be.

              I gave the problem some serious thought and came up with a solution.

              First, I had my phone dial Jackass #1.

              A man answered nicely saying, "Hello."

              I yelled "You're a jackass!", but I didn't hang up.

              The jackass said, "Are you still there?"

              I said, "Yeah."

              He said, "Stop calling me."

              I said, "No."

              He said, "What's your name, Pal?"

              I said, "Don Hansen."

              He said "Where do you live?"

              "1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house and my black Camaro's parked out front."

              "I'm coming over right now, Don. You'd better start saying your prayers."

              "Yeah, like I'm really scared, Jackass!" and I hung up.

              Then I called Jackass #2.

              He answered, "Hello."

              I said, "Hello, Jackass!"

              He said, "If I ever find out who you are..."

              "You'll what?"

              "I'll kick your butt."

              "Well, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now, Jackass!" And I hung up.

              Then I picked up the phone and called the police. I told them I was at 1802 West 34th Street and that I was going to kill my brother-in-law as soon as he got home.

              I made another quick call to Channel 13 about the gang war going down on West 34th Street.

              After that, I climbed into my car and headed over to 34th Street to watch the whole thing.

              Glorious! Watching two Jackasses throwing punches and kicking one another in front of 6 squad cars, a police helicopter, and channel 13 news cameras!!!

              It was one of the greatest experiences of my life!

              Name withheld to protect the guilty.
              -Andy

              Comment


                That was the hardest thing to read ever.
                Need a part? PM me.

                Get your Bass on. Luke's r3v Boxes are here: http://www.r3vlimited.com/board/showthread.php?t=198123

                Comment


                  I gave up
                  Originally posted by bmwm42
                  PNW vulture pm me for parts
                  Strategic nw e30 command

                  Comment


                    That was pretty damn funny, well, when I could finally figure out how to read it. Looks like 1/3rd of the story would get copied and pasted in random parts of the story.
                    Autobahn Motorsport - Portland, Oregon - BMW restoration + service
                    @autobahnmotorsport - 503.206.7905
                    '88 M5 | '89 330is

                    "The car makes it possible, but the driver makes it happen." - Jim Levie

                    Comment


                      I'm looking for a good running cheap early model 318i. Doesn't have to be immaculate, but runs well. Looking to pay between 800 and 1200. If anybody knows where to find one, let me know. A good friend of mine is looking for reliable transportation on the cheap.

                      sigpic

                      Comment


                        Originally posted by 1craze30 View Post
                        I'm looking for a good running cheap early model 318i. Doesn't have to be immaculate, but runs well. Looking to pay between 800 and 1200. If anybody knows where to find one, let me know. A good friend of mine is looking for reliable transportation on the cheap.


                        Needs fender, hood, passenger door and a passenger side control arm. Ran and drove great prior to sliding into a ditch. 84 318i

                        Comment


                          Originally posted by EN318isPDX View Post


                          Needs fender, hood, passenger door and a passenger side control arm. Ran and drove great prior to sliding into a ditch. 84 318i
                          Lolll


                          Bahama Beige E23 Project
                          Bluebird Bus Conversion
                          New Oregon Trail

                          Comment


                            Originally posted by LuckyHenriksen View Post
                            Lolll
                            Where is that late model gas tank? Slacker, how much you want to swap the gas tank on my friends 88 Seta?

                            Comment


                              How long has iit been sittin in the ditch?

                              sigpic

                              Comment


                                Originally posted by 1craze30 View Post
                                How long has iit been sittin in the ditch?
                                It was there less than 10 minutes, control arm was bent on removal. Frame looks good. Owner said he went in the ditch ~25 mph. It has the baldest tires i've ever seen

                                Comment

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